


Don't Let Me Down

by Agent-Lizzo (NotEvenRossi)



Series: Heaven & Hell bingo [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel has The Mark, Castiel in the Ma'lak Box, Episode: s15e09 The Trap, Gen, Missing Scene, SPN Heaven and Hell Bingo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:54:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23330494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotEvenRossi/pseuds/Agent-Lizzo
Summary: "Ever since the Mark made Cas go crazy? Ever since I had to bury him in a Ma'lak box?" -Dean Winchester (15x09)****There isn't major character death, but Castiel going into the Ma'Lak box is very similar to it, so be careful if that bothers you.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Sam Winchester (implied), Dean Winchester/Other(s) (implied/past)
Series: Heaven & Hell bingo [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1704946
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	Don't Let Me Down

**Author's Note:**

> This is for the Missing Scene square on Heaven and Hell bingo
> 
> Credit to ChloeDarling (ao3) // dissect-me (tumblr) for beta reading!!

Dean was the big brother. The rock of their small found family. Even when he was crumbling himself, it was his job to stick it through… To man up, and do the hard thing. That’s what he reminded himself over, and over again. That was the only way that he didn’t break in the eerie calamity of the woods, a thick layer of silence weighing between him and Castiel; there were no animals around which was odd... perhaps they could sense the vibrato of murderous intent barely concealed beneath Castiel’s skin. 

Walking through the woods felt wrong to Dean. This was all wrong. He almost stopped to ask Castiel if this was the right thing. Maybe they had more time. There had to be another way. 

Man up, Winchester.

Dean knew that this was the only way. Sam knew that this was the only way, even if he couldn’t bring himself to send Castiel away. Even if a hushed “I love you” before he had to drive away to keep himself from begging Castiel to stay was all Sam could manage. Dean was the big brother, and it was his job to do what needed to be done, even if that meant locking away his best friend in a box for eternity. He could do this. He would do this. 

“You are thinking very loud.” Castiel’s voice suddenly cut through the silence leaving Dean to tense up entirely. Dean hadn’t been expecting Castiel to speak, and was unsure if that would make this more or less difficult. This could be one of the last-- No. The last time he would hear Castiel’s gravely, too blunt, words. 

He didn’t give Dean a moment to respond: “This is the right thing. The only option, Dean.”

“Stay out of my mind, Man, c’mon.” 

Because what else was he supposed to say?

Castiel didn’t look particularly sorry, but nonetheless an apology left his lips “My apologies, Dean. Your thoughts were very obtrusive.” 

For a moment things felt… normal. At least slightly. Dean reprimanding Castiel for being in his space mentally or otherwise was too normal. It felt wrong. Nothing about these wretched circumstances should have a shred of normalcy. Castiel was supposed to be powered up, and hulking out. He was supposed to be the thing they were hunting. Why couldn’t he make everything easier, and be the damn monster he was supposed to be turning into? The monster they were saving the world from. Anything that would make it feel like he wasn’t locking his best friend away for eternity. 

Silence befell the two of them once again; The Ma’Lak box came into view. Dean knew it was risky to allow Castiel to walk out with him, but couldn’t bring himself to deprive Castiel of his last ounce of dignity. He couldn’t try to treat Castiel like a rabid animal even if his actions displayed that to be the truth. This was Castiel. This wasn’t the monster who decimated a whole town. This was his best friend who could make Sammy smile like no one else. This wasn’t the celestial being who almost killed Claire Novak. This was the father who would give his all for Jack, or Claire, and then some. This was the seraph who was taking the ultimate sacrifice to protect the many universes. 

Castiel was the man, and the monster. Even if Dean couldn’t reconcile the two pictures of his best friend; He was both. 

“Why are we in the woods?”

Dean and Castiel had already talked about what was happening here. Castiel knew what he was doing. 

Dean hadn’t realized he pulled a face, but based on Castiel’s next words he had: “The Ma’Lak box is meant to go to the bottom of the ocean where it will never be found, correct?”

Oh. Right. 

“Sam and I-- We’re going to figure something out, yeah? This is temporary. I promise you it’s temporary, alright?”

Dean didn’t know whether he totally believed that nor if his words were to console Castiel, or himself. Dean didn’t realize they had stopped walking… How long ago did they reach the box? He could have swore he put it out further in the woods than this. Maybe he should pump the brakes on this whole thing until they got the box in a more secure location. He was stalling.

Castiel was stepping into the box. 

“Wait-- Wait! Wait Cas… Already?” 

“Yes” It was too simple… too Castiel… It made Dean’s blood boil, but he refused to let that show. 

“We could look for something else, man.”

Castiel shook his head. It had been a very last ditch attempt; Dean was unable to keep his weakness from shining through slightly; they both knew it was too late. 

“So this is it?” Dean felt as if he was being pulled apart at the seams, his icey exterior melting; his words held a nearly desperate edge. 

“We both know that this is the only way, Dean.” he repeated; the words were essentially a mantra that he had been repeating over, and over for weeks. Since Castiel had first brought up the possibility of the Ma’Lak box. 

He faltered for a moment, before asking “End of the line?”

Something about quoting Benny felt wrong, yet simultaneously fitting in this moment. Dean knew he was the big brother. It was his job to protect the world, to protect Sammy, but why did killing his only friends always have to be the consequence? Benny. Lee. Admittedly they’d both been more than friends, but they were Dean’s best friends first. His family. Now burying Cas for eternity? It was too much. This was too much. 

Dean couldn’t even begin to comprehend how long eternity would last. Castiel would be there long after both Sam and Dean passed away. Civilizations would collapse, and arise anew; This godforsaken planet would rot, and the skies would collapse leaving nothing but a shell of the Angel they once knew, and that fucking coffin. 

Castiel didn’t say anything for a few long moments, just sitting in the box. He hadn’t laid down, still obstructing Dean’s ability to close the lid. Dean didn’t know if he wanted him to lay down so he could get this over with, or if he wanted these last few moments of torture to last an eternity. 

“You and Sam will take care of eachother.” It wasn’t a question, or a command. It was nothing more than a statement, as if the fact Sam and Dean would prosper was a universal truth. Dean didn’t speak, only pulling Castiel into a hug’ the sides of the Ma’Lak box getting in the way. Dean didn’t care for one moment, allowing himself to give away, and hold Castiel tight enough that the Ma’Lak box dug into his stomach, likely leaving a deep bruise. Dean didn’t care. He didn’t care about anything at that moment. 

“I’ll pray to you. Sam too.” 

Castiel laid down. 

“And one day you won’t.”

Dean wondered for a moment if Castiel was going to tell him to tell Sam he loved him, or something cliche like that, but he doubted it. The two of them had gotten their goodbye’s out of the way long before now. 

“I’m gonna miss you, man.”

With that Dean grabbed the lid of the Ma’Lak box. Lowering it slowly… If Castiel asked him to let him out he was unsure if he could finish the job. 

“It was a pleasure knowing you, Dean Winchester.”

Silence. 

A brutal clank followed by straps, and locks being clicked into place. 

Dean looked down at the sigils, and Enochian carvings, his hand caressing the box as if it was something special, his forehead rested against the wood. Patting the box twice as a non verbal goodbye… or maybe an apology, Dean couldn’t tell which; He finally stepped back. 

With that Dean maneuvered the box into the already dug hole with some difficulty. The weight of the box, and Cas was heavy, but he managed nonetheless. 

Dean’s vision was blurred for a moment leaving him struggling to find the shovel. 

Thud. 

The sound of dirt hitting the coffin. Dean knew the noise would haunt him for the remainder of his life. It was so familiar, yet completely uncharted territory. 

Thud.

It was too much. 

Thud. 

Dean didn’t know what to do, but the rhythmic thud of his movements was too overwhelming. 

Thud. 

“Hey Jude. Don’t make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better” 

Thud. 

Dean was unsure if the all too familiar lullaby was an attempt to soothe Castiel, or himself.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! In the future I'll likely add more from Sam and Castiel's perspective!


End file.
